We know how to find relationships, but the relationships we’re looking for in our early to mid-twenties aren’t always ones that would be immediately recognizable as functional (or even desirable) by a member of the previous generation.Watching Hannah Hovarth on Girls, the TV show that anybody over 35 seems to have decided is the mirror-image of how twenty-somethings lead our lives and conduct our relationships, one would be forgiven for coming to the conclusion that finding serious commitment is a bit of a struggle.The article cites a laundry list of reasons for this depressing landscape, both economic and technological, but the fault seems to lie in the hookup culture that permeates major cities and college campuses around the country.Because we came of age by hooking up at parties, the argument goes, millennial women are confused (and in despair! To say that women in their twenties are frustrated and powerless to influence the kinds of relationships they want to have is an unfair (and unwarranted) characterization of our generation.But just because it’s not romantic doesn’t mean it’s a lesser experience.In a millennial dating life, there’s room for both.We, too, are opting for more freedom, more variety of experience, more sex in our twenties. The Times article cites this example from one twentysomething urbanite as an example of our generation’s dating dysfunction: “After an evening when she exchanged flirtatious glances with a bouncer at a Williamsburg nightclub, the bouncer invited her and her friends back to his apartment for whiskey and boxed macaroni and cheese.” Call me crazy (or simply too millennial), but it sounds like Lindsay had a fun night, the type of evening she’ll fondly recall when she’s looking back on her youth in New York City.Which is not to say Lindsay (or anyone else) would mistake this experience for romance.
We millennial women aren’t victims of hookup culture; we’re complicit in it.As public attitudes toward online dating and legalized cannabis shift, a new opportunity to openly connect members of the marijuana industry has arisen.High There is a mobile dating app for people involved in the cannabis industry, or anyone interested in meeting people from the marijuana community.Plus: Why We Still (Really) Need Dating Of course, if your goal is more than these types of laissez-faire experiences, but rather a serious, meaningful connection with someone who wants a long-term relationship, the solution is clear: Don’t go home with the bouncer who lures you with boxed macaroni and cheese.It’s a nuance that millennials understand, and people watching millenials date often don’t: we GET the difference between a hookup and a date. Sure, sometimes the lines get blurry: sometimes we end up falling for someone who simply doesn’t want what we want, and when that happens it’s enough to send us into a Hovarth-like tailspin of angst and self-doubt. And, to a certain extent, online dating: I wouldn’t have a job if enough people weren’t serious enough about seeking a relationship to need a website in order to efficiently do so.